RECIPE: De Blob And Tetris Cupcakes

I modelled mine on the Japanese de Blobs.

You may or may not remember that I wrote an article for IGN AU and Kotaku AU the other day about a professor who claimed that violent videogames (“violent” being interpreted quite broadly as anything that involves destruction) cause people to be more aggressive.  Well, I have a new theory to throw into the mix. Videogame cupcakes make people more aggressive.

My goodness, I was one angry girl when I was baking those de Blob and Tetris cupcakes. They were the most frustrating things to make. In the time it took me to sculpt a de Blob, I had grown a luscious beard that reached the floor and, because I’m incredibly uncoordinated, I kept stuffing up and had to try again and again and again. All for the sake of a mother trucking cake.

Below is a recipe for the marshmallow decoration I made. You can use it on any cupcake — chocolate, vanilla, orange — and you can even cheat and bake those Betty Crocker-style “dick cake in a box” things, and then add the decoration on top. It’s not like anyone will actually care whether or not you baked it from scratch. If they ask, you can lie and they’ll never know. Conveniently, I didn’t document the cake-making/baking process this time, so you’ll never know whether or not I actually made these cakes from scratch! Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t; I’ll let that play with your mind for a bit while I show you how I made the marshmallow fondant.

Click through to see what I did…

Recipe: Tetris Brownies

I worked at one of my current places of employment for more than half a year without ever speaking to anyone but my boss, largely because I was terrified of approaching my colleagues and initiating conversation. I couldn’t even bring myself to say hello to them, through fear that I would tangle my words and start speaking in a crazy southern dialect of broken Chinese.

At some point, I decided that I had to stop being such a social retard and start being a normal person by talking to people. So I came up with a reason to make contact. I decided to bake.

I started with simply things, like cupcakes from a box and scones. Then, I figured that if I was going to be baking for a bunch of gamers (which I was), I might as well have some fun with it! So here is a step-by-step recipe for Tetris Chocolate Brownies, the same brownies that recently won me some friends at work. They’re easy to make (even easier than the Triforce shortbread cookies that I made for Eegra!), and if you’re demented enough to screw up the recipe, then you don’t deserve to have friends.

Right, so let’s start this shit up, foolz!